Things are looking up (preg ment)

So. You know how, when you are going through a cold, icy, snowy, windy winter, a day eventually comes that is a little bit different? It is still cold, icy, snowy, and windy, but the air smells a little bit different, the sun seems to shine just a touch harder, and you just know in your heart that spring is on the way.

That is what things are like around here. I am still mostly chained to the sofa with my faithful barfbucket at my side, I still have to force myself to drink 2 liters a day, my main source of nutrition is still animal crackers, but something is a little different, some small things that make me think the day is on its way that I am going to arise from the sofa like Lazarus from his cave. And that makes me very happy.

Some small signs:
– On Monday, for the first time, I managed to climb the 3 flights of stairs to our apartment all by myself. It wasn’t pretty, and it didn’t exactly go quickly, but – I – did – it. And I was as proud as a toddler who just figured out how to tie her shoes.

– On Tuesday, I had barely eaten all day. When Mr. Nishkanu came home from work, he asked me what my heart desired. And I said, “You won’t believe this, but what I really want is a tuna fish sandwich on floppy American bread.” (Note: I haven’t had tuna fish in two years, and I normally can’t stand floppy American bread; and I haven’t been able to stand the thought of any meat or fish since 6W). Mr. Nishkanu turned around into the pouring rain and went back to the store to buy me tuna fish and he even found a loaf of American-style bread (note: we are not living in the US right now). And he made me a tuna fish sandwich, I ate it, it was good, and it went down and stayed down. And then I ate half the loaf of bread, toasted with butter. Yum. And that all stayed down too. It was like a total miracle.

– On Wednesday, Mr. Nishkanu made a “normal” dinner for me – asparagus with hollandaise sauce and boiled potatoes – and I ate a “normal” sized portion of it. Granted, I had a massive stomach ache afterwards and I threw some of it up, but hey, that is not so different from when I eat plain pasta, no sauce. Hey, I ate a normal dinner, folks!

– Today, I did not have to take an hour’s nap to recover after my shower, I just rested up for a while and felt better.

But the most amazing event of the week was Thursday, when I had my first OB appointment. Mr. Nishkanu took me and was rewarded with the sight of the little one on the ultrasound screen. You see, our local RE has a super cr*ppy ultrasound machine, where our little one has only ever looked vaguely like a styrofoam peanut. But the OB has a super fancy ultrasound and we could see right away that our baby is not just a fuzzy blob but has a head! and a body! and arms! and legs! And not only that, it was actually waving its arms and legs around. And then, in the excitement of being televised, it started to wiggle all over, shaking that groove thang like a crazed disco dancer (I guess it liked the sugar rush from the preggie pop I had just ingested to try to politely avoid barfing in the OB’s lap). We were both totally amazed. For the first time it really seemed real, that there really is a tiny little person in there happily growing away. And I’ll tell you, that feeling makes the last couple of weeks of nauseated zombiedom totally worth it.

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1 Comment »

  1. Liv said

    I just read your weekly account to my husband while we are having our coffee. He thinks you are a warrior! And I would have to agree!! Very proud of your recent accomplishments. I’m crossing my fingers that the worst is behind you.

    So, happy that you had a great OB appt. What a dream, after all you’ve gone through. Yay!

    Thanks for your “unexpert” opinions/comments on my posts. Coming from you they mean a lot! (can’t believe the conversation with the NYC clinic!) Have a great weekend… oh, and-
    Happy FREAKIN’ Mother’s Day Nishkanu Momma!

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